Choices you make makes an impact on your life

Life’s choices they will come back to haunt you in the long run if you don’t make the right choices. But if you make the right choices in your life good things will go your way and if you make the best of those good things life will come easy, but if you like me and you take the good things and make them into complicated as they can be.

                If I can give advice to not just anyone in particular but everyone is that don’t take everything for granite cherish the life you have because when it’s that time for you to go six feet under the ground that’s it, that’s the last of you I mean all you will be is just a memory in every loved ones hearts. If there is something that I have learned about life is that nothing comes easy and that you have to work your ass off to have good things in life. As well as take every moment with your loved ones you have left to tell them you love them more than anything and make sure they know it.

                Even when you’re in school and there are teacher willing to help you get your work done don’t be like me and not take the help when it was offered to me. Now I’m a senior in high school and at risk of not graduating because when I didn’t know what was going on or don’t understand it I don’t ask for help because I don’t want to be made fun of because of me not comprehending what is going on with English and history I just don’t peak an interest in either of those classes. Then I get to failing and then I just keep getting further and further behind in my work and then I just dig myself out of the whole that I’m in I just want to graduate this year to prove everyone wrong that don’t think I will graduate and walk across that stage and get my diploma.

Life

Ever have those moments that you just want to curl up into a ball and cry for hour’s non-stop just about nothing? Well I feel like that most times because I just feel like I’m nothing to anyone and I’m no on this planet for nothing like that people all they do is drag me down when I get that feeling it’s like when that happens they just kick me when I’m down and proceed to beat to hell.

                I feel like that most of the time when I am at school all it is, is a fake smile I put on to make everyone else happy and make them feel better. Felling down like everything is a big shadow and like nothing ever does the way you want it to. You’re in a deep hole that you can’t seem to reach that edge that is just do close to your fingertips, but yet just far enough you can’t grasp the soft dirt of the edge of the hole.

                Every day is just another challenge for me that I have to face all the time whether it’s a small challenge or a big challenge it don’t matter it’s something that I deal with. When I wake up in the morning most people are wondering what they will wear when in my head I’m wondering what will the day bring for challenges for me today.

                This school year has been the biggest challenge yet it was suppose too be a great year this year you know go through senior year in high school my hope was to graduate with flying colors but yet that won’t happen I’m sure of it, it will be another year that I cut it way to close and I don’t want to cut it to close I hate being of risk of not graduating I don’t but it just seems like I can’t get away from it my grades prove that I am at so much risk of not graduating school.

Always in my Heart

The one person that I love most in this world has always been there for me always helped me through the good times and the bad. She wasn’t very old at all either she was only 62 when she passed away two years ago she was very important to me there are three people important to me my amazing mother that has been my guardian for the pasted like seven years while my dad wasn’t then there is my grandmother that I have lived with for four summers in a row. Then there is all of my true friends that have been there for me.

           

My grandmother was one of the people that helped me though my problems and always told me that everything will be okay. I love her to pieces. I wish I could build a time machine if it was possible so I could go back two years ago all I wanted to do was say that I’m sorry for everything I did and how much I wish I could take it all back. If I would have known that this would have been the last time I saw her I would tell her that I love her so much and I don’t want you to leave gram please I would do anything to make you better.

But I wasn't there with her I was at my house with my dog watching him because he couldn't go on a plane with my mom and Steve when they flew to Florida to stay with my grandmother then on their way home gram and my grandfather were driving and she told him to drive to the closest hospital. That’s where she stayed my mother and Steve were notified that she was in a hospital in Virginia and it was three in the morning so I was tired and I fell back asleep with Richter at my feet. I have only seen my mother cry maybe five times in my whole life. That was one time that I held my mom so tight and told her that I’m there for her no matter what and that I loved her so much. :’(

               

My mom came back home the next day and told me that gram died with a smile on her face. It sucks because she died on my mothers birthday:’(

College

Getting accepted to UTI to go to college has been the best thing that has happened this year. Going down to UTI is one thing that I have to work for but I know it will do some much good for me I still have so much to learn about diesel motors and there isn't any other college I know UTI is a great college for me I can see myself getting down there and learning so much.

When I went down to take scholarship test for the college and we toured around the campus and all I could think about in my head was “holy crap this place is huge!” the ride down sucked but then it was made up when Esther’s boyfriend Rickey and I were looking out the windows and waving to people to see if they would wave back and most of the time they would wave back I was in the back seat ans Rickey was in the front. My window was tinted so I has to roll my window down every time I wanted to wave to people. But anyways Esther made a bet with me and him that she would give us five dollars that we couldn't get the first eight-teen wheeler to honk there horn which was fun while it lasted.

Then we got to the campus and all could do is just look wide eyed at everything that was around me. Esther and I walked into the building walked to the table where there was a very nice gentleman who asked us our names so we gave the guy our names. There were a lot of people there all at one time looking around the school getting to know the instructors as well as me because that’s where I hope to go to school for eight-teen to nine-teen month and hopefully graduate and make something of myself because even if no one on this planet don’t want me to graduate well that’s their opinion

I have family and greats friends which is the one thing in the world I trust we have our break outs but we get through them like normal people would.

MUD

Let’s just say that I am a down home country boy and I was born and raised out in the sticks and there isn’t where else I want to be. The one thing in my life that makes me happy is combination between water and dirt it makes this wonderful thing in the backwoods. The wonderful thing called mud I don’t like the mud with too much water and not enough dirt. Mud makes me happy even if the whole world crumbles around me I can always count on that beautiful wonderful combination.

                If I can give any advice from me and from my experience trust no one but yourself your life will go on and will go one a lot smoother and you will not have any distractions in your life. Strive to be the best that you can be and not care what anyone else thinks but your family. Family is the most important thing that is in your life I don’t.

                Just the slightest dreams about going mudding being in a big truck or even a four wheeler I dream about going deep into a mud hole and just givah the dinnah and pray to god we don’t get stuck it is like dipping your toes in the water and then once those are in you jump in. if you get stuck you don’t call for help you do everything in your power to get her out of that mud being in the mud and being able to throw a chew in it just calms me down and puts me in a mood where I just don’t care and that nothing around me can take that feeling away from me. I love mud, mud makes me happy I just don’t know how to describe it. It just puts in like a dream world like im untouchable like nothing can ruin that moment for me